When I Doubt GodNew Every Morning | January 10, 2021
O God, I feel like a hypocrite.
Many would say I am if they knew what I think
and what I believe—or rather, don’t.
Everyone else seems sure of what they believe.
But when I try to say the creeds or sing the hymns,
some of the phrases stick in my throat.
I can’t bring myself to speak words that I don’t believe
When others say comforting things about trusting you,
knowing you are in charge,
and believing that everything is in your care,
I can’t join them in their confidence.
I’m just too cynical. Or maybe too wounded.
Whatever it is, I feel separated from those around me
by my questions and my doubts.
About the only thing I can say I believe for sure today
is that, as the Bible says, you are love.
O God, help me to believe that I can entrust myself,
even with all my doubts,
to your unwavering, unending love. Amen.
—Mary Lou Redding, Prayers for Life’s Ordinary and Extraordinary Moments (Upper Room Books, 2012)
Where do you turn when you are filled with doubts? Join the conversation.
Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
and do not rely on your own insight.
—Proverbs 3:5 (NRSV)
Prayer for the Week
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I turn to my experience of a Loving God. The Living God I know from experience is ever-present – even when I am thinking “wrong,” acting wrong,..believing wrong, questioning, doubting, judging, hating.
I consider myself a Jesus Follower. I fall far short of my desired life, I fear, get angry, depressed, selfish, and sometimes very unloving- yet God is with me. I think God doesn’t give me challenges in order to learn a particular lesson, but that if I am seeking to truly follow Jesus as we are told through the Holy Scriptures he lived- then God is with me and live in the palm of God’s hand.
I don’t know if I have had the doubts expressed in today’s reflection. I’m fairly sure I have not expressed what doubts I had in such a way. I do think that my faith, belief has grown. Early in life I had no idea about God. Going to church as I grew up developed my faith. Then for many years I was, as Wesley puts it, an almost Christian. The event of my life that jump started my spiritual life came when Soo Ok passed away and I made a decision to commit to God. Perhaps that was my “heart warming” experience. I had two mountain top experiences and since then am grinding along on the valley. Have had very positive growth, understanding at the VT and now NH churches I attend with mind changing and growing Bible study. I am frequently challenged by my son who thinks faith, belief, God, and Jesus are all nonsense. He is embarrassed that I believe. The saying that my strength, our strength, comes from the hills fits me. Walks in the wooded mountains here in NH
help me a lot. Peace, quiet, and talks with God fortify me. Thank You, Lord.
Missed two church related ZOOM activities this week as my computer was being repaired, but with renewed speakers I am ready for ZOOM worship this morning. New hearing aid batteries should help too.
Thankful democracy has prevailed in the US. So many problems need attention. The virus needs to end, a concerted effort and it can happen. Then other problems can be tackled.
Prayers for the UR family’s needs, concerns, and joys. Yes, even in these gloomy times there are joys. First and foremost, God is with us. Thank You, Lord for the blessings of the day.
I do indeed feel as the author describes. I also feel the reasons are as she states. I though even feel unworthy of His love. I try turning to the Bible and read other sources that show His love for even the lowliest.
Prayers for Marcy who is still silent though I have tried texting and calling.
Prayers for Robert and his son. Megan is not a believer but she does not denigrate me for mine, for this I am thankful.
Prayers for Jill and Larry. Ii am sure they will be watching the big game today, sorry we are cheering for opposing teams. Prayers for both of you to remainsafe and well despite the rising numbers of infections in your area as well as mine.
Prayers of welcome for Susan Marks, may she and her loved ones be safe and well during this time of increased COVID infections in our country and may she feel welcome to comment anytime.
Prayers for Ally and David, Lou and Rick and all of those we haven’t heard from in so long.
I turn to my loving Father – He is there with His arms open, His Spirit brings to mind the peace I may not be tuned it to at the moment, but which is surely there. I reach out to friends, who will pray for me and with me. I recite Psalms, regarding His steadfast love and faithfulness.
Today is the second straight day of glorious sunshine and it just makes everything so much better. Dad is coming over after lunch to take a walk and maybe watch a bit of football. We will be at our respective houses tonight for the “big game”. In my youth, Julie, I was a huge Steelers fan – loved Bradshaw, Swan and Stallworth. Some time later I got put on the right path…ha ha. I am not sure I will make it through the whole game tonight, I am an early-to-bed person. Hoping to take a nap late afternoon, after dad heads home. Will tape it and watch it tomorrow if I don’t take it all in tonight.